I was in 4th grade. My best friend Bryan, a conniving little prick, decided he wanted my sacred Charizard Pokemon card. You know, one of the highest level Pokemons ever obtained. I was reluctant of course. Despite this, his 9 year old rationale seemed reasonable…”lets rock-paper-scissors for it”. Oh, OK, yes that is the fairest way. You’re right Bryan. So henceforth we went, trading rock and paper blows, with the occasional surprise scissor. Eventually he won, and my beloved Charizard went bye-bye. 
Flash forward 12 years, now a senior in college, and this form of conflict resolution is still used, and used a lot. Take for instance today. In an important group meeting about the logistics of our final paper, we decided to let the meat of the essay be decided by a r-p-s match. So we went ahead, and this time I came out victorious. I won the coveted prize of only writing the introduction. My fallen opponent? He’s stuck with 4 pages of misery. Rock-paper-scissors is unforgiving.
Inherent in this phenomena is the absurd willingness of both conflicting parties to participate. Whether it is over the last piece of cake or who gets to go after the blond at the bar, people quickly agree to the terms and conditions. No matter how steadfast one may be in their convictions, if rock-paper-scissors presents itself, more times than not hand gestures will be thrown.
It’s how I decide who gets first serve in Volleyball Intramurals. It’s also why I keep owing 12 packs of beer at the start of almost every weekend.
This got me to thinking, what if every major conflict was decided by a rock-paper-scissors match?
The Trojan War (Achilles vs Hector): Hector throws rock-Achilles throws scissors = Greeks go home = Mythology abolished. 
War in Middle East: Palestinians throw rocks (not hard to imagine)- Israelis throw paper = Palestine concedes their territory = Middle East becomes top vacation destination
North Korea Nuclear Arms: N. Korea throws paper- UN throws scissors = Lights stay on after 8PM and Koreans can attend the next World Cup.
Gay Marriage: Gays throw paper – Constitution throws rock = Adoption rates go up.
Next election I am voting for the official that believes in Rock-Paper-Scissors as their foreign policy.
What a Day! 